Hi Virtually Readers! As a book lover, I have a bigger brain have a wide variety of experiences, some of which have actually happened to characters and not to me. Whoops. I have all sorts of associations and memories which have to do with books, and this has gotten me into some troublesome situations in the past.
- Pronouncing words
I consume a lot of words, because I’m a reader. However, this means that there are some words I don’t know how to pronounce. The word caveat for instance, I thought was said ‘cave-eat’ rather than ‘cav-e-at’
- Associations with books
When you read a lot, you know a lot of stories. For me, this means that I have lots of associations with words that are complicated and boring to explain. The other day, I was reading the back of a pamphlet, which described itself as a ‘monograph’. I remembered a character in a book—I don’t even remember which book—writing perpetual monographs, trying to get them published. This made me smile slightly. A person who I know slightly came up to me and said ‘what’s so funny? What’s that little smirk about?” The smirk became a grimace, I hurriedly put the pamphlet down, made a weird giggling noise, and walked away. THIS IS ALL THE FAULT OF MY PROLIFIC READING I SWEAR AND NOTHING TO DO WITH MY OWN INHERENT AWKWARDNESS.
- Bumping into things
I am all about efficiency, and in order to get more reading done, I cram it into moments when I’m doing something which doesn’t require a lot of attention. Like, say, walking. A few days ago, I was walking home a few kilometres from where I’d been watching an event of my sisters. I was reading at the same time (Captain Corelli’s Mandolin, if you’re curious) and managed to drop my water bottle twice, once in the middle of the road (turning pages is hard), almost collided with a skateboarder, got halfway across a road without looking up, almost ran into several people, and hit a lamppost. (on other occasions, like many of them, I have actually hit people). Never let anyone tell you that reading is safe, okay?
- Listening to things
Sometimes when I’m reading, I get so into the world that I don’t pay attention to people talking to me. Other times, the book is an excuse for intentionally ignoring them. I listen to audiobooks frequently, and in the interest of preserving my hearing, I have them fairly quiet. This means that if someone (usually my mum) asks me something, I can respond. If the conversation continues though, I get hopelessly confused, don’t listen to my audiobook, don’t listen to them, and generally make a fool of myself.
- When no one gets your costume
I’ve done bookish costumes a couple of times; I was Lirael for a Halloween thing one time (which was literally the only time I’ve dressed up for Halloween), and then no one knew who I was or appreciated my costume and it was tragic and consequently I’m never gonna dress up again. (I mean I totally am but…maybe not Lirael. sorry Lirael. You’re great, but the haters did make me go home and cry)
I think my conclusion from this exercise is that books get me into trouble. But oh well, I think they’re worth it! Has reading books ever led to awkward situations for you? Tell me in the comments!