blogging · not books · Shar

Mysterious Search Terms

Hi Virtually Readers! Cait, a most wonderful blogger, ‘replies’ to her search terms in her monthly recaps. Shanti and I have always found this most amusing, so today I’m going to reply to some of the search terms that lead people to our own blog. Also, our blogoversary is in two days (!!!) (yes, we won’t shut up about it. This only happens once a year, after all). So this seemed a fitting thing to do? We have more celebrations planned for next week. Some deliberate misunderstanding, and a great deal of gentle mocking, is going to go down.

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  • Zen Thumped: Zen thumped who, is what I want to know. Don’t hit people. That’s not civilized behaviour. Nor is it Zen.
  • We all looked up character development: You’re looking up character development. Not me, I’m afraid.
  • Move to Himalayas: A most excellent idea, I can say, having done it myself.
  • A world without you Shanti: I shudder to think, but I imagine it would be rather bleak and a little less sarcastic.
  • Outline of a body: Step one: lie body on large piece of paper. Step two: Draw around it.
  • How to make simple Essay paper bookmark: Step one: Write an essay or paper, ideally 1-2 pages long. You (or your teacher) may choose the topic. Step two: Print out said essay, preferably double sided, because if your bookmark is more than one page it will be annoying. Step three: Use the print out to hold your place in the book you’re reading. If you’re not reading anything, get yourself a book, read a few pages, then use your essay/paper bookmark to your heart’s content.
  • Deathly Hallows illuminati: If you ask me, the existence of the deathly hallows unequivocally proves Illuminati is real.

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  • Virtually Read Blog: You’re in the right place, is what I’m going to say.
  • What is the symbol of a triangle with a circle and line in it: *INSERT INTERESTING DRAWINGS* I’m not really sure. One of these.
  • Sven: a most noble reindeer. I’m not sure why you’re looking for him here though…
  • Extraordinary means blurb: I thought it meant remarkable, but there’s lots of colloquial interpretations, I suppose.
  • extraordinary means theme: I guess it has several definitions.
  • exoticbooks.com : That’s not our url, but don’t worry, there’s plenty of exotic books in this blog if you look.
  • reading all day: Great idea! I wish I’d thought of it myself.
  • mountain lion claw marks on stone: *makes up fact* that’s what it does to mark its territory.
  • reaq sharpage: That’s a very interesting thing to say… but I have no idea what it means.
  • Shar and Shanti reading blog: You have summarized our website more concisely than I ever could.
  • Percy Turns 15: That’s great! Am I invited to the party?
  • review now means: You’ve left me hanging! What does it mean now? Am I reviewing wrong? #existentialcrisis
  • whatever you like is okay: that it is, person. That it is. #wordsofwisdomfrominternetstrangers
  • where can I buy the wrath and the dawn for cheap: Not here, I’m sorry to say.
  • write down the importance of branch account: It probably is important, but I definitely haven’t written about it.
  • Anyone beautiful pictures: that’s a question I ask myself on Instagram every day. (I’m joking, that would be more like ‘everyone’s beautiful pictures)

That’s not all the search terms, but they’re my favourites! Thanks to wordpress for informing us of some of our search terms, and to everybody who found this blog: I’m not trying to mock you (that much). Thanks for clicking on our links.

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Does your blog have amusing search terms? Do you ever choose to deliberately misunderstand them? What’s some strange things you’ve searched for?

 

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11 thoughts on “Mysterious Search Terms

  1. “Shar and Shanti reading blog: You have summarized our website more concisely than I ever could.”

    Pretty sure that was me. I can never remember your reading blog name for the life of me. That must have been the first time though – now I save time and just type in “shar reading blog” or “shanti reading blog” and it works fine too.

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  2. It really makes you wonder about algorithms, you know? I never pay too much attention to the search terms on my blog, but one of the weirdly mysterious ones includes is several lines long and goes as follows:

    “i’m the bad guy! it’s time to tell the story! do not be afraid of me ! you’re new , let’s help ? and will cns response ! i just gold! about how long does anyone was not, i can see the fear in your eyes ! the story is told by , and you know … i just gold! you are then to not shout ! tebow would otherwise my cry ! and you found himself in a suit freddy ! and you’re not getting out ! ahahahahahahhahahhahahahhah , but it was so davno.a i ‘ve been waiting for you! we are waiting for you for a long time , come here quick ! and you’re here to get a miracle!”

    sooooooooo

    yeah.

    I’ve also got “ariel vs belle” and “benefits of watching a movie after reading the book” so there’s that.

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  3. LOL, this was great! I laughed out loud a lot.

    Most of my search terms are actually fandom references and so make a lot of sense considering my blog (although, there is a strange amount of “quicksilver,” “wanda and pietro,” and terms like that leading back to me, considering I only did one post about them. I’m not complaining though, since I love them and I do love that post).

    HAPPY EARLY BLOGOVERSARY!!

    Alexa
    thessalexa.blogspot.com
    verbosityreviews.com

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    1. That’s good! I’m glad you thought it was funny, because I found some of these searches freaking hilarious. It’s funny because the biggest search term we get is ‘how to make a bookmark’ because shanti did a post on that once. Fandoms are the best 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Hahhhhhh I loved reading this! Honestly search times can be SO BIZARRE. 😂😂 I get so confused over mine quite frankly. And I laugh my head off because no one can spell “paper fury”. I mean it’s not even that hard??! But I get SO many hits for “paper furry” papre fur” and “paper fry”…although tbh I kind of do want to be a fry so that works.

    I like the “whatever you like is okay” one.😂😂

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    1. You’d think Paper Fury would be easy to write but okay maybe not (alternative: they were looking for fries/fur/papre)
      ‘Whatever you like is okay’ seems so random. I should have added that murdering people for fun is not okay (but if they don’t like your favourite book… well.) I’m so glad I can see our search terms because they’re the funniest. XD

      Like

    1. I don’t know why some search terms are hidden and some aren’t? These were from almost 3 years of blogging and we only get a few each month, so I’m sure you’ll have more as time goes on 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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